One of the very most crucial things that you ought to master is the
ability to recognize and hit hard in a window of opportunity. You’ll
never, ever wind up in the friend zone as long as you do two things:

Get compliance (make her work to meet your standards and please you),
and always take windows of opportunity.

A window of opportunity is any time she encourages you to escalate:

If you miss a window of opportunity, it’s bad for value and it’s bad
for attainability: It makes the girl question if you’re a guy of high
status. And if you are of high status, then she figures she doesn’t
stand a chance. So, you must hit windows of opportunity hard.

Here’s some common verbal ones, and good default answers to them:

In bars and nightclubs:

“This place is lame.”
Response: “Totally. Let’s get out of here.”

“I’m hungry.”
-> “Me too, I know this great Thai place nearby. You like Thai?”

“I love this song!”
-> “C’mon, let’s go dance” (if you like to dance)

At closing time:

“I still want to drink…”
-> “Yeah, I know a good spot nearby.” (go to your place)

“I still want to dance.”
-> “Really? Cool, I know a good spot.” (go to a club nearby you like,
a party, or your place)

“I’m not tired…”
-> “Me neither… I’m hitting up an afterparty, come along.” (go to
your place)

“I’ve got [food, drink, tea, coffee, whatever] at my place.”
-> “Yeah? Let’s stop by there in a while.”

First meeting, daytime or nightime:

“I know this really cool [place].”
-> “Sounds neat - you should totally take me.” (if she says yes, set
a time right then, and get her number)

“I cook a really good veal parmesean.”
-> “Oh that sounds delicious, I’m dying for a homecooked meal. Make
it for me… next, hmm… Tuesday night, six o’clockish?” (if she
says yes, get her number. if she says no to the time, say “another
time, then” and get her number)

“I’m about to head to a party after this…”
-> “Hmm… yeah, that sounds okay. Alright, sure, I’ll go” (say it
like you’re seriously weighing out the option after being invited -
if she blinks heavily at that, just smile a joking smile and laugh)

In response to you mentioning…

A new CD, DVD, book of art, or something else you just got:
“Oh, that sounds really cool!”
-> “Yeah, it is. I’ll show you [right now/sometime]” (and take her
with you right then, or get her number as appropriate)

There’s also many nonverbal windows of opportunity, including things
like cuddling up to you, getting closer to you, etc. If you miss one
of these, it’s very important that you DO NOT immediately try to
compensate by going for it. If you miss a spot to physically escalate,
wait and go for it in a bit.

Here’s some of the more subtle yet more potentially powerful windows
of opportunity to take:

At or near your place:

“It’s such a long drive home…”
-> “Yeah… well… I guess you can stay the night, but I’ve got to
be up really early in the morning.”

“The weather is so bad…”
-> “Shit… Yeah, I guess you’re right. Hmm.. well, I guess you can
stay the night, but I’ve got to be up really early in the morning.”

“Oh, I’ve had a lot to drink.”
-> “Whoa. No way you’re driving then. I’ll either call you a cab and
you can come back for your car in the morning, or you can crash and
head out in the morning.” (if she protests, say, “no! you’re not
driving, period.”)

“Do you have roommates?”
-> (answer honestly, but realize it’s a window of opportunity, so
invite her back either way)

At or near her place:

“You’ve had a lot to drink, huh?”
-> “Damn… I guess so. Yeah, ok, got a couch to put me up for the
night? Wait, and an alarm? I need to get up early.”

“You look tired.”
-> “Yeah, I am. Can I crash here for like an hour or so before I’ve
got to head back? I can’t stay too long though…”

Any time she asks about where you live, mentions where she lives,
says anything that refers to logistics including cabs, cars, or
distances, says anything that limits mobility or driving ability
including drinking, tiredness, weather, or distance, any time she
mentions that one of you has something that she likes or thinks is
interesting -

These are windows of opportunity. Girls simply won’t say them to guys
that they don’t like on some level. Always try to escalate them;
usually it will work. Have fun, keep playin’,

Sebastian

I have a simple rule with my girl:

“You’re always right, but we’re going to do it my way anyway.”

It’s a cute technique that satisfies her in a number of ways. You’re not saying
she’s wrong. You remain dominant, decisive and in control. And on the rare chance
that she actually is right, you can save face by laughing it off with a “Baby haha,
you actually WERE right. You’re so smart…” and give her a kiss.

A President should respect the counsel and advice of his Vice President, but
ultimately he must make his decision and move.

Judd

A Soulmate’s Moment is one of the most powerful things you can
achieve when meeting a woman - maybe you’ve felt it. It’s when you
feel that deep belief inside you that you two were truly destined
for each other. It was once thought to be only rare and special
occasions that they could be felt.

As of March 2007 - you can create them.

My friend Jonathan and I were partying at his loft. His girlfriend
is amazingly beautiful and they’re totally in love with each other.
She’s a top model for one of the top agencies in the United States,
who has done work for Levi’s, Calvin Klein, major alcohol brands…
An elite girl in every sense of the word. And together we analyzed
how they’d fallen head over heels for each other:

By pure chance, a Soulmate’s Moment had been created: A Soulmate’s
Moment is when you two find out that you have the same weakness
wrapped in what appears to be your biggest strength.

For Jonathan’s girl, she’s an elite model, blessed with both natural
beauty and charm - but it also takes a lot of hard work to develop
your physique and charm. It turns out Jonathan has built himself
in a master of the social arts - for a similar reason that his girl
became a model.

They both strive to be the center of attention, but come from
backgrounds where they were both kind of smart, dorky kids. Finding
out that what was most intimidating to outsiders about her - her
carefully built social image - was also her largest insecurity -
made her and Jonathan have a Soulmate’s Moment.

To create a Moment like that:

*Show her you understand her strength, and relate it to a key
strength you have
*Show her you understand why other people are intimidated by her
strength (which implies you’re not)

and

*Show her you understand how it comes at a price, hurts sometimes,
and other people can’t see that.

Extremely powerful.

For some of the girls that are highly desirable - and quite
intimidating - here are four of the top combinations that to create
Soulmate’s Moments:

Beautiful/Insecure
Successful/Fear of Loss
Privileged/Sheltered
Outgoing/Hardened

We’ll have more on this tech for you playboys - Seriously powerful,
so recommended only to use on girls you truly like.

Sebastian
–
theApproach: The Science of Social Chemistry for the Modern Gentleman

Or better yet, how do you let her know that the vibe you’re putting off in the beginning is the real you?

How does she know that after she sleeps with you all of what you said will be backed up?

All three of these questions have the same answer.

Credibility.

When most guys think they don’t have enough value, 90% of the time, it’s credibility they lack. In fact, most of everything used to create value these days only serves to make a nasty woman-repelling player vibe.

(and anyone who’s anyone KNOWS I don’t even teach value. Not for a damn second!)

“Player vibe” is not actually a bad vibe, but a mistake in building and maintaining credibility.

Being able to create credibility is one of the key components to sleeping with a girl quickly.

The other component is sexual tension.

And as a good student of pick-up, you know that some women need sexual tension to sleep with you and the other half need credibility first. (You do know that, right?)

So let’s get down to it:

There are three levels of credibility.

1. Safety
2. Commonality
3. Direction

Safety: The most basic and fundamental level of credibility, you need to demonstrate SAFETY before a woman will be alone with you and sleep with you.

Commonality: You need to demonstrate commonality in order for a woman to continue sleeping with you, or have a relationship with you.

Direction: You need to show direction in order to get a woman to leave her current boyfriend or change her existing life plans to be with you.

A WORD ABOUT SOCIAL PROGRAMMING ->

You have to realize that every person you meet is socially programmed in a different way. Even you have social programming. We all do.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing. On the contrary, it’s very useful.

Realize that although we understand a lot of a woman’s behaviors come from her social programming, we can’t expect her to realize that.

While men have evolved an instinct to try to sleep with as many women as possible, women have evolved an instinct to choose guys who demonstrate a high chance of sticking around to raise children.

And this instinct is reinforced by social programming.

Her programming is her reality. Her programming is literally her world.

And credibility is about showing you understand her world.

HERE’S AN EXAMPLE ->

Think about if you were in your bedroom. Comfortably warm sitting in a chair.

And then a guy came in. And he said he was cold.
And wanted to turn up the heat. Then he told you he liked the couch you were sitting in.
And asked if he could urinate in the corner.

You would feel pretty uncomfortable with him. You might even think he’s crazy.

He’s showing you that he’s not seeing the same reality as you. He’s “in his own world”.

I bet you wouldn’t trust a guy like that.

Because he has shown you that he doesn’t understand your world, and doesn’t respect your world - you probably wouldn’t connect with him, or feel like giving him compliance.

This is how women feel when you don’t demonstrate credibility.

If she thinks that it’s a bad thing for people to kiss and tell (and most women do) -> You should show her you ALSO believe it’s bad for people to kiss and tell.

The fact that you have the same perceptions about the world as her will build your credibility immensely.

You can think of the three levels in this way:

Safety - It’s safe to have you in her world.
Commonality - You see the same things in her world. (Similar perceptions, values, and goals)
Direction - You have the ability to rearrange and alter her world.

These are best demonstrated in order.

And you can get really good at this. At first, guys are usualy good at meeting a certain kind of woman.

It’s because he naturally understands a certain type of worldview.

But as you get good, you’ll start to be able to match ANY woman’s worldview.

The best way of doing this is by anticipating her thoughts and verbalizing her feelings or views about the world, as if they are your own.

At first you will just be remembering things she’s said in the past, and then repeating it after she’s forgotten she’s said anything.

Then you will get good at pacing her reality and leading. Eventually it gets to the point where you can intuitively understand her reality. Then she will trust you to change it for her. You enter her world, and then start teaching her new things about HER world.

That’s when you know you get this thing.

When someone comes along who understands a woman’s reality so well, she doesn’t just think he’s perceptive and skilled, she just feels a connection.

She thinks “He’s just like me!”

This is really the easiest thing in the world. Yet so many people mess it up.

It’s a major piece and you’ll watch your game improve dramatically once you get this.

Vin

There is no doubt that having standards and holding women to them
is good for both value and compliance. It shows you have value in
that you can afford to have standards and think well of yourself,
that you deserve a quality woman. It’s good for compliance when you
hold her to your standards and she tries to meet them.

On top of all that, after she meets one of your standards, you can
reward her for it and show her that that qualifies her to be with
you - which increases attainability.

Screening is, in short, a good thing. But a lot of times, guys have
a hard time making screening questions Situationally Relevant. They
aren’t able to create the context necessary to screen.

What you can do in place of screening questions is use
statement-based screening. It’s screening in a way that doesn’t ask
her if she meets your standards, but instead puts your standards
out there and offers her the opportunity to show she meets them.
This begins to work once you’ve base compliance and she’s started
to initially get attracted to you.

What you do, quite simply, is put out a statement as to what you
like or don’t like. If the girl likes you, she’ll want to show she
meets that standard.

Example:

Screening question: “Can you cook?”
Screening statement: “I like girls that can cook.”

This also has great application for screening in response to a
story she had, where a question might be very verbose.

For instance, a great thing to screen women on is having female
friends in addition to male friends. Trust me on this one, you
don’t want a girlfriend that can’t get along with other girls.

So if the girl is talking about how she doesn’t like most girls and
doesn’t get along with them, you can drop a screening statement: “I
hear you, girls can be tough. I think it’s really important to have
friends that are guys and girls though.” -> This is almost
guaranteed to get her backpedalling and trying to impress upon and
to you that she has female friends too.

The great thing about screening statements is that they’re actually
more compliance than passing a screening question. While there’s a
social obligation to answer a reasonable question you’re asked, it
feels to her like she’s just volunteering that she’s up to your
standards when you make a statement. And on the flipside, you’re
putting less effort in - so she’s giving you more effort after
you’ve put in less. A good formula.

Now, realize one last cool piece of the puzzle. Girls - especially
very beautiful girls with great social skills - often use
screening-based statements on men. They’ll mention in passing that
they value something or other, and most men will jump to say
they’re that.

Instead, a good answer is to just smile and agree with her, perhaps
saying the word, “Cool.”

Examples:

Girl: “I really think what car a guy drives says a lot about him.”
You: “Cool.”

Girl: “I expect my boyfriends to take me out to really nice places.”
You: “Cool.”

It dismisses the screen from her without being combative. You
smile, and say something like, “Cool.” Very high value stuff.

Keep playin’,

Sebastian

After you get a girl’s number, you’re going to want to take her
out. But calling and trying to set up a traditional date a few days
in advance is often a losing proposition when the girl flakes, and
you’re left… wondering.

Yesterday, we talked about social backup planning. Girls often
accept plans with a “yes” when they really mean “if it’s the best
thing going on at the time, then yes” - guys who are used to
honoring their commitments or have busy social lives often don’t
understand it.

Today, here’s a few techniques to short circuit the bidding
process. These are far superior to the held-over-from-1923 “give
her 3 days notice before a date because it’s gentlemanly” nonsense
that can prompt flaking.

Get her out:

1) The “something just got cancelled, where are you right now”?
2) “What a ridiculously fun night”
3) The Awesome Two Weeks Later Plan

1) Call her up, greet her, ask what’s up as normal, and then go on
with, “My [xxx] class just got cancelled, so I’ve got a few hours
free. Where are you right now?” Note the wording - “Where are you
right now?”, NOT “Are you free?” If you get where she is, you can
come to judgements about how free she is and where you two could
potentially go. After she lets you know where she’s at, go ahead
with, “Cool, I can come by there and we can hang for a bit.” If she
asks what you’re doing, either come up with a plan, or let her know
something along the lines of: “The company is more important than
the event - we’ll hang, chat, have a good time… we can grab
coffee or food or whatever.”

This creates a sense of urgency. Note you should be in
communication at least in the last two weeks before you call her
abruptly… this works best if she perceives you as having a busy
schedule. I say outright, “I don’t have much random free time, but
I just freed up and would love to see you.” - of course, being busy
is hard to fake. Much better to actually be busy. Another
derivative - “I thought I’d be working late, but I had to come in
earlier and wrapped up earlier…” - the idea is that you’re
offering a spontaneous get-together, and there’s urgency on the
decision. If she’s in the middle of something pressing, she’ll tell
you when you ask where she is, or just not answer her phone.
Bidding process short-circuited.

2) Ever want a girl after clubs close on a weekend night? Of course
you have! Text this: “what a ridiculously fun night” in a mass text
to every girl in the local area that you regularly text. Whoever
texts back, “what did u do?” or something along those lines - you
immediately call. She’ll answer most of the time - now go ahead
with, “Wow! Tonight’s been a blast… I don’t want it to end. Where
you at right now?” After she says, say, “Cool, I’ll hop in a cab.
On my way. What a blast” - talk on the phone the entire drive or
cab ride if possible - you don’t want to get off the phone for this
one.

The score: It can be social suicide to call girls at 03:00 and ask
what’s up and try to chat. It screams, “I didn’t get any” if she
doesn’t answer. Of course, if she does answer, you’re in… the
best of both worlds? The text. The girls awake and bored WILL text
back, and then you suck them into a whirlwind of fun. Tried,
tested, and theApproach approved.

3) And one of my personal favorites - plan a really, really cool,
really, really fun exclusive date for two weeks or more in advance.
Sound like the opposite of all the other advice you’ve gotten so
far? Check this out:

Plan something just utterly fantastic together, like going to an
awesome concert, or otherwise a completely amazing time. Then, call
her and chat with her in the weeks leading up to the date. One of
those calls, suggest doing something right then and there, or in
another day or two (but still significantly before the major
awesome event). There’s a very minimal chance of flaking when an
awesome event is planned in for the future. Where did this get
discovered? From talking with guys who took girls to “prom”, a
formal American dance in high school. It’s hyped that people sleep
together during prom, but that’s not what actually happens. Most
times, if the couple sleeps together the first time during “prom
season”, it’s because they went out to hang out and get to know
each other better BEFORE prom.

Now, I’m not going to say actually going to the awesome event is
optional after bedding her, but y’know…

Keep playin’,

Sebastian
–
theApproach: The Science of Social Chemistry for the Modern Gentleman

Refresher:

Attraction is created by having all of,

Value: Something fills a conscious or subconscious need for a person
Attainability: Have a chance to get that value
Compliance: Put work and investment into reaching the value

For getting women,

Value: Traits that are universally valuable, or valuable
specifically to the woman
Attainability: Compatibility, Respect, and Legitimacy
Compliance: Work or effort put into the interaction, to impress or
please you, to handle logistics, or accepting something she doesn’t
necessarily like

Fashion time!

What’s wearing a bunch of gold chains do (assuming they’re not
tacky)?

Think about it -

What’s it do to value?

What’s it do to attainability?

Compliance?

Okay…

Wearing a bunch of gold chains shows you’re indifferent to
arbitrary social pressure, confident, and bold. At the same time,
it shows a nonchalance and playerish attitude.

So for most women, a bunch of gold chains would be:

+V
-A

It would make you more valuable, but make the woman wonder if
you’re the real deal.

WAYS TO GET +VALUE FROM YOUR CLOTHING WITHOUT -ATTAINABILITY:

Coordination
Good Fit
Functional Accessories

Coordination: Do your items match? The easiest to match are your
belt, shoes, and watch. Matching those three will make you look
like you know what you’re doing aesthetically, and make you look
sharper.

Good Fit: Regardless of your body type, you want to wear your
clothes *tight* - if you’re a skinnier guy, you’ll “swim” in excess
material. This can be especially tough for my American gentlemen,
since American clothes are cut large around the middle. Vincent - a
relatively skinny guy - recommends H&M on the low end and Hugo Boss
on the high end for a good fit if you’re on the skinny side. If
you’re a bit heavier like me, excess material makes you look f-a-t.
Go tight, even though it’s counterintuitive, and it’ll actually
thin you out and make you look stronger. For what it’s worth, I’m
around 6′0 and 165 lbs and I wear x-smalls sometimes in American
sizes. Actually, don’t think “tight” - think “sleek”. Then kill the
excess material.

Functional Accessories: You get +V from wearing cool accessories
that set you apart. The thing is, if you wear immense amounts of
rings, bracelets, and necklaces, it can make you seem unattainable
to women. She’ll ask, “Could a girl like me get a guy like him?”
and not be sure of the answer. If she reckons, “No, he’s out of my
league” then - whirr, you’re done.

But you can get all the bonus to value without losing any
attainability points by sharpening way up in what we call the
“functional accessories” - these are the items that people are
expected to wear. These are what you want to snazz up. Look for
especially cool socks, with perhaps an argyle pattern or in baby
blue. Belt, watch, and scarves are also functional accessories.
Winter hats and gloves, too. Points for matching scarves and hats
if you can.

WAYS TO MAKE YOU MORE INTRIGUING AND POTENTIALLY ATTAINABLE TO MORE
WOMEN:

Color
Contrast

Color: If all of your wardrobe are “guy colors” - black, blue,
grey, and brown - start looking for a wider range of colors. Many
men aren’t aware that purple is an extremely masculine color - it’s
represented nobility in the West for centuries now. Most guys look
very good in a light blue as well. If you go a little softer on the
colors, it’ll make you stand out as well as seem more friendly and
approachable.

Contrast: Contrast is excellent because if opens up doors for you.
I strongly recommend really “manly men” types that are into contact
sports, pushing iron, and raising some hell create a contrast by
softening the look up. No more than three years ago, my casual
wardrobe was all construction boots, jeans, sneakers, and jerseys.
The thing is - the kind of women that like manly men will still
like you damn well if you’re wearing a nice wool or silk scarf. On
the flipside, guys that are sensitive and gentle can often do very
well when wearing a sharp power suit or hardening their look up
with a leather jacket. Women that are naturally in tune with your
personality type will still dig you after just a couple moments of
interaction, and women that are attracted to the opposite will
become intrigued and it becomes easier to get in and get a window
of opportunity. There’s something to be said for repping one solid
theme throughout every single thing you do, but if you’re looking
for things to play with - pick up some clothes that contrast your
natural personality, just for fun.

One of the newest theApproach Alumni from last weekend’s Los
Angeles program said it really well: “I don’t buy things that match
my style. I buy things that I want to try out and see if I like.”
Makes sense to me - you’re not marrying your clothes, fella! Mix it
up a little, and keep playin’,

Sebastian

Originally from theApproach Alumni forum.

A lot of people have been asking me about attainability lately, and I get the sense that maybe people don’t have quite a good handle on it. I’ll try to clear it up a bit since it is probably the least understood / codified concept in the community but at the same time the most powerful.

The lack of proper attainability game accounts for so many guys not closing the deal it makes my head spin.

Firstly, attainability is NOT “Let the girl know she can get you.”

It has a very specific set of definitions which I’ll get to in a moment.

First, let me tell you where my research on attainability comes from:

1. It comes from my 3+ year development of Natural game in which a basic assumption is that you assume more emotional strength / stability than the girl. What flows from this is the fact that you MUST reassure her in some way as opposed to making her insecure which always has potential to introduce enough doubt to start the ARM (auto-reject) mechanism cycle. The ARM cycle of course will prevent the girl from seeing your value, and cause her to treat you as if you have none.

2. Long talks with a seasoned bisexual female PUA friend of mine, who has fucked more girls than both Sebastian and I put together, I think she got started in middle school or something silly. She claims to have never failed in converting a seemingly “straight” woman (married, boyfriend, no matter) once she decided she wanted her. She basically broke down her method to me (well it wasn’t really a “method” per se until I codified it and called it “attainability”) It now is the basis of our Attainability component in the VAC system and revolves around the concept of building friendship. Asking my bisexual friend how she fucked all these girls, in one sentence she could answer “I just became their friend”.

3. Crystalization of “High Value Attainability” which came to me in a sensory deprivation tank experience (one of the inner-game / goal reaching things I do, which produces clarity you’ve never experienced - they say 90% of your brainpower is used up processing the input of your five senses - remove the input and you get that 90% back…) I jumped out of the tank and took notes frantically for later review.

VALUE:
So basically, we understand the V component, which is to demonstrate higher value - and in Natural Game we do it by passive demonstration, not active demonstration.

Active demonstration a la Mystery Method flows like “I have to increase my value now, let me tell X story”

Passive demonstration a la Woodhaven Natural Game flows like “Which reminds me of X story. (Whoah she’s gonna LOVE this one!)”

The problem with active demonstration, even though they both involve story X, is that the story is delivered from a need to increase value, which can be sensed by 95% of women, especially attractive ones who are used to that type of thing and see it 20 times a day.

Passive demonstration works fine, and combined with proper focus (Charge the venue, proactively socialize etc…) produces value in spades.

COMPLIANCE:

Compliance is necessary since people need to work for every other thing that is valuable in their lives. Ever had the feeling like “That’s too good to be true” or “That’s such a good deal, it’s gotta be a sham” That is the feeling that comes from the perceived lack of putting work in for something. Compliance lends CREDIBILITY to your value.

Make them work.

ATTAINABILITY:

Attainability is defined three ways. Doing any one of these three will produce proper attainability and allow you to capitalize fully on the value you have built. If you refuse to build attainability you will need to create approximately 10X the value to get the same effect.

1. Respect as a friend.

Does the girl feel like she could be friends with you, regardless if you’re having sex or not? Do you have commonalities, common interests and observations? Can you vibe and make each other laugh?

Use respect as a friend to kill the player vibe, and show her you are willing to stick around after you sex her, or even if you don’t sex her. Ultimatums are for losers. Ironically, respect as a friend will increase the chances of her sleeping with you.

Most hot girls with things going for them screen out players. Guys who say girls love players are sleeping with ugly girls, regardless of what they tell you

2. A girl like me can get a guy like him.

Are you capable of sustaining friendships and relationships with girls of similar characteristics? Demonstrate closeness with other girls. Do your social proof to get this one. If you can’t do real social proof, use implied social proof.

Example - implied social proof:

Her: “What did you do today?”

You: “Oh, it’s a long story. Ok ok.. I have this friend named Jen. And she slept with this guy I know. And the fucking idiot goes around and tells everyone he slept with her…

The girl finds out and shes just devastated, so shes all upset. She calls me up and she wanted me to find out why he opened his big mouth about it.

So i told her she could come over - I was just basically staying home practicing guitar, so she came over and watched… and we talked…

It’s really too bad though, cause she’s such a sweet girl - and she just wanted to know why some guys are like that.

And in the end I really didn’t have a good answer for her. What would you tell her?”

3. Conditional Availability.

This one goes hand in hand with compliance. Let a girl know she can get you by working or meeting some condition. Show that you like something very specific about her that is also non-physical. This is where screening and qualification comes in. You use it to set up challenges.

Here are some quick examples:

-Most of my friends are X. What’s the most X thing you’ve ever done?

-I have such a soft spot for girls who are X. Do you consider yourself X?

-Vulnerability: “Most of the girls I’ve had relationships with haven’t been all that
attractive. People ask me ‘What are you doing seeing that girl? You can do
better’. It’s because they’re generally really fun people who were really nice
to me, really giving. They also took an interest in the things I am passionate
about.”

-”You know most people I meet are hard to connect with, but I feel there’s something about you that’s very genuine.”

-”You have a very down to earth sense of humor. It’s easy to be with you.”

-”You know I meet so many girls who play games. But you don’t have time for that bullshit. You’re so real and genuine… I like that.”

VAC MANIPULATION:

The beauty of the VAC system is it’s nonlinearity. You can fix or improve your situation at any point in your interaction, depending on where your V, A, C values are at. The only other factor you should be aware of is precedence, and for now just realize that the more times you have hurt precedence (she made decisions against your favor, she acted on decsions against your favor, she “socially announced” decisions against your favor) the longer time it will take to reverse it.

If you have V and A, get C.

If you have A and C, get V.

Or in my following example if you have V and C, get massive A:

VAC Manipulation LR:

I was a Boston Nightclub in the fall time on workshop. I was doing a demo on an HB9.2 - (there’s a link to the pic at the bottom of the post if you want an idea of how I scale my ratings) Chick was in a group of about 6 girls and 4 guys.

I go in SitRel, socialize with the group etc, screen quaify, vibe..etc. My VAC at this point is relatively nice and even. (It’s better to have a well rounded VAC than huge deficiencies, as you’ll see in a moment)

Talking for 20 minutes, I decide to get back to our guys - I eject cordially and catch up the guys. About 30 minutes later I see HB talking to another guy.

I find Sebastian, and he somehow convinces me it would be fun to blow the guy out.

I go in, use standard Woodhaven AMOG tactics for Sebastian’s amusement. Normally I would just befriend the guy and slowly sap his value away, but I was in an asshole-ish mood.

Guy straight up walks away from me and the HB.

HB looks at me and exclaims “What did you say to him! Where did he go!”. Ooops.. She was actually being set up with that guy through a common friend.

I have value (walked right up and killed some guy’s game) , I have compliance (she was forced to accept the consequences of my actions), but I have a major attainability problem. A friend would never do something like that.

I grab her number using one of my dirty tricks, and go back to the workshop. (Even though I got the number, it was pretty much bad)

I use an open loop text message. (These ALWAYS work) - no response from HB.

I call her and leave a few messages - no response.

A few weeks later I text her “Simon from american Idol. What’s his last name?” (A common VAC text message / VM that I use)

She texts me back and tells me to leave her alone. She then calls and starts yelling at me.

Convo like this:

HB: “Why are you calling me?”
Me: “Uhh why not, you were the one who gave me your number?”
HB: “You’re not supposed to have my number. You tricked me into giving it to you.”
Me: “Are you THAT gullible that people can trick you into giving your number away?”
HB: “And what did you say to that guy - you made him leave!”
Me: “Don’t blame me if a guy isn’t interested in you, sweetie. It’s not my problem.”
HB: “Don’t EVER call me again.” -click-

Realize NO guys ever talk to this girl like that. They don’t stand up for themselves and they don’t call her on her shit.

Me = Asshole: Value and Compliance = high, Attainability = low

A few weeks go by, and I decide to call her, and fix my attainability as an experiment.

Christmas eve, I call back, surprisingly she answers:

Me: “Hi sweetie, I know I upset you before, but with you know, christmas is coming and everything and I just think we should put the past behind us, and I want you to know there’s no hard feelings.” (Major high value attainability)

HB: “Yeah you know with the holidays right around the corner theres no reason we should be like that, we could maybe start talking and stuff.”

With a line that takes 10 seconds to say, I have built proper attainability and reconstructed my entire VAC with this girl.

Why did this work?

You have to realize that people only emotionally react to those who have higher value than them. HVA presupposes an emotional effect (I know I upset you before).

I then framed it as if we were old friends burying the hatchet and making up. This solves Attainability definition #1 - respect as a friend.

She started calling me on a regular basis, I arranged a meet, handled logistics and full closed her.

We are now still together, and within 3 weeks of the full close she’s in love and tells me so.

Vin